Archive for the ‘Consulting’ Category

When Eavesdropping Saves the Day

Posted: September 23, 2025 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
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I know that eavesdropping is rude, but for a mind reader who hears thoughts like they’re spoken out loud, it’s a whole different story. I have to work really hard to keep from hearing other people’s business, so the line between accidentally hearing someone’s thoughts and deliberately snooping has gotten a lot blurrier.

That’s why I work extra hard to keep from hearing my husband’s thoughts. He hates it when I pick things up that he’d rather I didn’t know, and I totally get it. This has been an ongoing source of contention between us, so I’ve been working extra hard to keep my shields up around him. Not only that, but Chris has been getting much better at blocking his thoughts as well. Normally, this would be a win-win situation, but not lately.

A week ago, Chris began acting strange, almost like he was auditioning for the role of “Husband With No Problems Whatsoever.” He was even extra-cheerful around me, and asking me all sorts of questions about my day, and hardly thinking about his. That was my first red flag. The second came when he started thinking about the most boring stuff imaginable. Tax codes, grocery lists, that jingle from the insurance commercial that gets stuck in your head for days… you know what I’m talking about. 

After that, I noticed him checking his phone and then immediately putting it face-down, then start to say something, but quickly change the subject. All of these things screamed “I’m fine” while meaning exactly the opposite.

If you know me, you know I’m not about to put up with that. But his mind was so closed, it was like running into a brick wall. A few days ago, it even got to the point where I tried the direct approach: “Chris, what’s wrong?” His answer? A practiced smile and, “Nothing.” Then a quick change of subject.

What’s a mind reader to do? Luckily, my answer came from an unexpected source. At Thrasher the next day, Uncle Joey broke the barrier. “How’s Chris feeling about the Brennan contracts?”

“What contracts?”

Uncle Joey’s eyebrows went up. “He didn’t tell you? I asked him to look into some contract issues for me. Nothing major, just some legal advice.”

“Uh… no, he didn’t.”

Uncle Joey leaned back in his chair, and I could hear his thoughts clearly. He had asked Chris to review contracts for a new restaurant venture, and was wondering why Chris hadn’t discussed this with me. Did than mean Chris didn’t trust me, or did it mean the situation was more serious than he’d thought. “Maybe you should ask Chris about it. I’d hate for there to be any… misunderstandings.”

That was his way of telling me to do what I do best, and listen to Chris’s thoughts so I could tell him what was going on. I shook my head. How did this happen? My boss was asking me to spy on my husband? Ugh! “Yeah… I’ll ask him.”

“Good.”

That night, I watched Chris push his spaghetti around on his plate while humming the theme from Jeopardy. Out loud.

“So…” I began. “Uncle Joey mentioned something about contracts today.”

Chris’s humming stopped. “What kind of contracts?”

“The Brennan ones?”

Chris set down his fork and rubbed his temples. “Right. Those.”

“Want to talk about it?”

He met my gaze. “Honey… this is one of those times that it’s better you don’t know.”

My eyes widened. “Because of Uncle Joey?”

“Yes. Don’t worry. I’m figuring it out, and it should all be resolved soon.”

“Sure, but what if he asks me about it?”

“Just tell him I’m working on it. Okay?”

I nodded, but this was killing me almost as much as it was killing him. How was I supposed to help my husband when he was keeping something from the mob boss for whom we both worked? I wanted to insist he tell me, but he’d gone back to singing that awful tune in his mind, so I knew he wasn’t about to relent.

I knew I had to do something. Uncle Joey would expect me to tell him what was going on and I’d have to tell him that Chris was blocking me out. It had the potential to make things even worse for Chris, which had to be why Chris wouldn’t tell me anything, right?

Luckily, right after dinner, I had to make a quick run to the grocery store because we were out of milk. I was coming out of the store, juggling bags and trying to fish my keys out of my purse, when I walked straight into someone coming around the corner. Groceries went flying, apologies were exchanged, and we both bent down to collect the scattered items.

“Shelby? Shelby Nichols?”

I looked up to see Tom Brennan. We’d only met once in Chris’s office, but I remembered him because he was well-dressed in that understated way that suggests money without flashing it around.

“Oh…hi! It’s Tom, right?”

“Yes. Sorry about this.” He finished picking up the last of my groceries, and handed them over.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

“You know… this is perfect timing. I’ve been meaning to call your husband.” Tom was thinking about how relieved he was to run into me, because he’d been feeling terrible about the position he’d put Chris in.

Tom had hired Chris months ago to handle some routine contract work for his construction business. Standard stuff, nothing complicated. But recently, Uncle Joey had asked Chris to review contracts for a new restaurant venture, and Chris had discovered that Uncle Joey’s project would directly compete with Tom’s business in the same area.

But here’s the part that made me want to hug Tom Brennan right there in the parking lot: his company had just landed a huge development contract on the other side of town. He was actually relieved to be pulling out of the downtown market entirely, which meant Uncle Joey’s restaurant wouldn’t be competition at all. Tom had been meaning to call Chris and tell him about the change, but he’d been swamped with the new project.

“You know,” Tom said. “I really should give Chris a call. We just signed this amazing deal for a west-side development, and I keep meaning to update him on how it’s going to affect our downtown plans.”

“I’m sure he’d love to hear from you.” I tried not to sound as relieved as I felt and we parted ways.

When I got home, Chris was in his office staring at his computer. I rushed in to tell him the good news. “Guess who I just ran into? Tom Brennan.”

Chris’s head snapped up so fast I was surprised he didn’t get whiplash. “Tom Brennan?”

“Yeah. He mentioned something about a new project and how they’re moving the location to the west-side and leaving the downtown area.”

Chris’s brows rose. “He actually told you that?”

I shrugged. “Well… no, but that’s what he was thinking. He said he needed to call you about it. So… is that what you’re so worried about?”

Chris sighed and his shoulders sagged. “Yes.” The whole story came pouring out. Chris was stuck in an ethical nightmare. He couldn’t advise Uncle Joey on something that would hurt his other client, but he also couldn’t tell Uncle Joey about the conflict without violating Tom’s confidentiality. He’d been losing sleep trying to figure out how to handle the situation without betraying either client or getting himself disbarred.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” I asked.

“Because you would have felt obligated to tell Manetto. It would have put you in a bind, and I didn’t want to saddle you with that.” Plus, he was thinking that Uncle Joey might have done something underhanded to make Tom’s company go away, which would have totally ruined Chris’s reputation and damaged his career.

“Oh… yeah. I see what you mean.” I shook my head. “Although… I can’t see Uncle Joey doing that to you, but I guess it’s a lucky turn of events that Tom’s company is changing direction.”

“Yeah… no kidding.”

The next day, Tom called Chris, just like he’d said he would. Turns out, his company was not only pulling out of the downtown market, they were actively looking for someone to take over their lease. Uncle Joey’s restaurant project went from being a conflict of interest to being the perfect solution for everyone involved.

Chris gave Uncle Joey the legal advice he needed, Tom got help transitioning out of a lease he no longer wanted, and I got my husband back to his normal stress level, which is to say the manageable amount that comes from being married to someone who works for the mob. Of course… we both do, so it’s no wonder that we have our problems.

Still, the real lesson here isn’t about contracts, ethics, or even accidental mind reading. It’s about communication, trust, and the fact that sometimes the solution is just one phone call away, and working together is always better than going it alone.

If we’d all just talked to each other from the beginning, we could have saved ourselves a lot of sleepless nights. But then again, if we’d done that, I never would have learned that Tom Brennan thinks my laugh is “delightfully infectious,” which was a nice ego boost even if I only learned it through thought-eavesdropping.

In conclusion… is eavesdropping a bad thing to do? Yes… for the most part, that would be true. But for me, it totally saved the day.

Until next time!

~Shelby

I’m in a Book!

Posted: March 26, 2025 in Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
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6

Yesterday, I went into work at Thrasher Development to talk to Uncle Joey about one of his colleagues. This man had done Uncle Joey a big favor, and now Uncle Joey owed him. Since it was usually the other way around, it made me a little nervous, especially because it probably meant that I would be using my mind reading skills to make it happen.

I got to the office and found Jackie standing over a box with a big grin on her face. She glanced at me and her smile got even bigger. “Guess what’s in the box!! My newest book!!”

Good thing I didn’t say it before she did, since I’d already picked it up from her mind. “That’s great!”

She snagged a book from the box and held it up. “The Hitman and the Psychic!! Isn’t that the cutest cover?”

I nodded, taking in the illustrated cover of a woman with long blond hair, flying off the back of a motorcycle. She was barely hanging onto the guy as he sped along a blue road through the clouds. Wait… was that a frown on her face? And those pink clouds… they almost looked like an explosion. “Yeah. That’s really cute!”

“Isn’t it? And guess what? It’s the one I’ve been writing about you and Ramos!!”

I nodded, but my heart rate spiked. I knew she’d been writing a book based on us, but I couldn’t help worrying about how close it would actually get.

She noticed my alarm and went on to explain. “Don’t worry… it’s not exactly you and Ramos… I mean, the characters in the book are based on the two of you… but no one will know. And you’re not married in the book, so the sex is totally fine.” She was thinking she’d changed the names to Stone and Serenity, along with a few other details. Although, if anyone who knew us read it, they’d probably see the similarities. Still, it was different enough that I shouldn’t worry. “And I used my Jocelyn Drake pen name, so it’s all good.”

“Wow. That’s… great. So what’s her psychic ability?”

“She has psychometry, so it’s different from your premonitions. It means that when she touches an object or a person, she gets a reading, or a vision about them.”

“Oh… yeah. That’s way different.” At least Jackie didn’t know I could read minds, or she probably would have put that in there, and my secret would have been exposed to the whole world! What a disaster.

“And I have another surprise. I dedicated it to you!”

“You did? Let me see.”

She held the book open to the dedication page which read: “To Shelby Nichols. You are the inspiration for this book! I hope you love it!”

“Oh, wow!! That’s so sweet! Thank you! I can’t wait to read it.”

“It comes out in two weeks, but I wanted you to have the first copy. Let me just sign it, and it’s all yours!”

“Really? Thanks so much! I’m so excited to read it!” While she signed it, I couldn’t wait to find out how her two characters got together. Was Stone just as sexy and hot as Ramos? I wasn’t sure anyone could live up to him, but I was sure anxious to find out. Plus… I could hardly wait to read the steamy parts. I knew that made me a bad person, but what could I say?

After closing the book, she handed it to me. “There you go.”

“Thanks so much. I’m going to start it as soon as my meeting with Uncle Joey is over.”

“Oh yeah… you’d probably better get down to his office.” She smoothed her brows, so I wouldn’t see her concern, but she was hoping that paying Tony back wouldn’t be too dangerous. On the other hand, it might make a great plot for her next book.

I managed to keep from rolling my eyes. “Hey, did you give Ramos a copy?”

“Not yet. But as soon as the meeting’s over, I will. Do you think he’ll read it?”

“Is his character a bad-ass and sexy as hell?”

She grinned. “Yup.”

I shook my head. “Maybe you’d better not. He might get a big head.”

She snorted. “Right… like he doesn’t already have one.”

“That’s true. Well… I’d better get down there.” I hurried down the hall, making a pit stop in my office to drop off my book and purse. At least now I had something to look forward to.

The meeting wasn’t as bad as I’d thought. Plus, with Ramos helping me out, how could I complain? I didn’t have to meet with Tony for a few days, so I hurried back to my office to start reading the book.

After the first few pages, I was hooked. Still, I decided it was best to read it at the office instead of taking it home. The last thing I needed was for Savannah or Chris to get wind of it. I ended up staying an extra hour, and I only stopped because Ramos came barging into my office. I couldn’t hide that I was reading the book, and he folded his arms with a knowing smile.

“You busy?”

“Yes. Go away.”

He shrugged. “Okay. I guess I’ll go without you.”

I sat up straight. “Go where?”

“Got an errand to run. It’s a beautiful day, so I’m taking the bike. See ya.”

“No! Wait. I’ll come. I mean… I need a break, so this is perfect timing.”

His eyes narrowed. “You sure?”

“Oh, stop it. Of course I’m sure.”

“That’s Jackie’s book, isn’t it. The one about us?”

“Uh… yeah. But you shouldn’t read it.”

His brows rose. “Oh yeah? Why not?”

I shrugged. “It’s a romance novel. You wouldn’t like it. Let’s go.”

He shook his head, thinking that he already had his copy, and he couldn’t wait to dive in. Especially if it made me this nervous. “Nice try.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not nervous. It’s a great story. And… what can I say? It’s kind of cool. Serenity’s a bad-ass. I wish I was more like her.”

“Hey… you’re a bad-ass too. What about the guy?”

I sent him a smile. “He’s… well… you’ll just have to read it and find out.”

We got back an hour later, and I didn’t have time to read any more, so I’m planning on getting into the office early tomorrow. I’m loving it so far. These characters are a hoot. I’ll be sure and let you know what I think about the book in my next blog post!! Maybe you’ll want to read it, too!

Until then,

Shelby

High-Class Grifter

Posted: December 12, 2024 in Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , ,
13

As most of you know, I work for a mob-boss. Because of that, there are some days that can get quite exciting. Uncle Joey is dependent on my mind-reading skills to help him in his business dealings, so I get to meet all kinds of people. Most of them are just trying to make a buck, and hoping to get Uncle Joey’s backing. I kind of feel sorry for them, since working with a mob boss isn’t ever the best way to go. There are always strings attached and once you’re caught, there’s no escape.

Of course, Uncle Joey isn’t quite like most mob bosses because he has a heart, at least where I’m concerned. But that isn’t true for everyone. One thing I learned at the beginning of our relationship is that Uncle Joey doesn’t like people who run or grovel. I tried running once, but Ramos showed me the error of my ways, and now look at me. I’m still here helping Uncle Joey however I can. On the other hand, I’ve grown quite fond of Uncle Joey as well as Ramos, so what can I say?

Back to my point. Yesterday, I accompanied Uncle Joey and Ramos to a special meeting. It was held in an exclusive club, quite high-class, and full of important people. I found out that once you pay your fifty-thousand dollar fee, you can use the facilities as a special meeting place. It’s exclusive enough that even a mob boss can meet with a politician and no one would even blink an eye.

Usually, Uncle Joey keeps me out of that side of his business, mostly because I have connections to the police and do consulting work for them. That’s why I was somewhat concerned about being in this setting with Uncle Joey in his official capacity as a mob boss, but I shouldn’t have worried. Like he told me, what happens in the club, stays in the club. But since I can read minds, I picked up that he really wanted me there because something wasn’t right and he wanted me to get to the bottom of it.

That made me smile. There’s just something about the challenge of figuring out the truth behind what people say that motivates me. I’m like a dog on the scent, and it’s a challenge I’m totally ready to take on. What can I say? Finding the lies, and confronting them about it, gives me a thrill.

We entered the club and were immediately escorted upstairs to a private room. The man we were meeting was already there and stood to greet us. He had a deep golden tan, with brown eyes and hair that had been streaked by the sun. “Hey mate. It’s nice to finally meet you.” He held out his hand to Uncle Joey. “Hudson Kramer at your service.” He spoke with an Australian accent, and immediately reminded me of Crocodile Dundee.

“You as well.” Uncle Joey gave him a firm handshake before turning to me. “This is my niece, Shelby Nichols, and my second, Alejandro Ramos.”

“It’s a pleasure.” After shaking our hands, he motioned to the chairs at the round table. “Shall we get started?”

We took our places and Hudson handed Uncle Joey a folder. “Thank you for meeting with me. That folder contains all the information you need about me and my company. As you know, I’m looking for investors in my mine. I’ve had a turn of amazing luck in finding a substantial deposit of black opals in the Lightening Ridge of Northern Australia. I have full claims and rights to this mine, which I own outright. So far, the opals we’ve excavated are some of the purest ever seen. I brought a few to show you.”

He turned on an LED desk lamp, with the light directed onto the table. Opening his suit coat, he unfastened the buckle of a small, black pack that circled his waist. He pulled it off and set it on the table. The hard case had a combination code which he entered before flipping it open. A smaller case sat inside and he opened it to pluck out a black velvet square of material which he laid flat on the table in front of us. Next, he took out a plastic bag and dumped four black opals of various sizes onto the black velvet fabric.

“This is a sample of what we have discovered.” He placed them in a row, and moved the light to shine on the gems. “Black opals are the most valuable form of opal – due to their dark body tone and the resulting vibrant play of color. A top of the range gem quality black opal can fetch prices up to $15,000 per carat. However, just because an opal is black doesn’t make it valuable. There are many factors including brightness and pattern which determine the overall value of opal as you can see here.”

He pointed out the differences in the opals and gave us the value of each one. The largest one he showed us was worth over fifty grand, a staggering amount. “All of these came out of my mine, and I’m sure there are more, but as I said, the cost of the mine has depleted my resources, and I’m looking for an investor such as yourself to continue operations.”

He went on to talk about the terms of the investment, and I had a hard time discerning if he was lying or earnest in his proposal. “The main reason I decided to approach you was because of your recent investment in the lost Taft Mine. I have a much better proposition to offer you, since our mine is not lost, and we have already struck gold, as it were.”

“Very impressive,” Uncle Joey said, picking up the largest stone to examine it more closely before setting it back on the fabric. “Your terms are quite high, but I might be willing to negotiate based on a percentage of the profits. How do you feel about that?”

Hudson’s pulse jumped, and he was thinking that now was his chance to sweeten the deal. “I am agreeable to that. If we could set up a steady stream of capital into the mine, I’m sure the outcome would more than triple your investment. How does an initial amount of ten million sound to you?”

Uncle Joey’s brows rose, that was higher than he’d expected, and it gave him pause. He had checked Hudson out, and believed he had the rights to the mine he spoke of, but the high price seemed extreme compared to the risk. “You’d have to find a lot of opals for me to make a profit.”

Hudson realized his mistake and cursed in his mind, thinking he should have stuck with the five million he’d been planning on. But the way I’d admired the stones made him go higher. He was glad I was there since it was easy to see that I liked them. If he played to my vanity, my influence alone could get Manetto on board.

“What do you think, Shelby?” Hudson asked. “Do you like the stones?”

“Oh yes. They’re absolutely breathtaking.”

He nodded. “It’s the black that brings out the colors.”

“Yes, I can see that.”

Hudson glanced at Uncle Joey. “You’re right about making a profit.” He pursed his lips. “Would you be interested in co-ownership? That way we would split the profits fifty-fifty.”

Uncle Joey nodded. “After my initial investment was re-paid, I would consider a fifty-fifty split.”

Hudson kept his face devoid of emotion, but inside he was jumping up and down. He might pull this off after all. If Manetto signed on for ten million, he could use up to three for the mine and pocket the rest. The mine would never pay out that much, but Manetto had to know it was a risk, and could hardly complain.

Hudson let out a breath, feigning indecision, like it was hard to give up half of the mine. “I can have the papers drawn up for you to look at and you can give me a decision tomorrow? Will that work?”

Uncle Joey glanced my way, and I smiled. “I love the opals. They’re so colorful.”

Uncle Joey nodded. “So what do you think about this one?” He picked up one of the smaller opals. “It would look great in a necklace.”

“It sure would.” I turned to Hudson. “But here’s the thing. Your proposal sounds good, but I think investing in your mine would be a losing proposition. You’ve done a good job with the presentation, but you went too far in your asking price. Naturally, Uncle Joey checked you out before the meeting, so we know you own the mine, but you haven’t had a lot of success with finding the opals you’re pushing.”

I shook my head. “Hudson, you’re playing a dangerous game. Cheating a mob boss out of his money is unwise. Just because you live in Australia doesn’t mean you’d be exempt from retaliation. You might think you could pocket the bulk of the money, but believe me, you’d be paying back every cent with interest for the rest of your life. Is that what you really want?”

Hudson had grown pale, and his eyes rounded with shock. “This is a legitimate enterprise. I’m not trying to swindle anyone out of anything.” He glanced at Uncle Joey. “Believe me, I respect your reputation. If this isn’t something you’re interested in, then just say so. I approached you first, but I have others who would be grateful for the chance to get in on the mine.”

He began to gather the opals, putting them back into his case and zipping it up. Before he put the case around his waist, Uncle Joey stood. “Hudson… Let me give you a word of advice. Never cross a mob-boss. Now… If you know what’s good for you, you’ll go back to Australia and we’ll forget all about this incident. Otherwise, I will spread the word about this grift you’re playing, and it won’t go so well for you.”

Hudson flushed. How had it gone so badly? “My business is legitimate, but I’ll take your advice into consideration.”

Uncle Joey held up the opal he still had in his hand. “I’m keeping this for my niece. What’s it worth to you?”

He was thinking five grand, even though it was only worth two. I turned to Uncle Joey. “He probably wants five grand, but it’s only worth two.”

Uncle Joey smiled. “I’ll give you one, and we’ll call it even since you wasted my time.” He glanced at Ramos, who pulled out a wad of hundred dollar bills and counted out ten of them. Ramos stepped over to Hudson, and stuffed them into the breast pocket of Hudson’s jacket.

I wanted to say, Keep the change, you filthy animal, but kept my mouth shut and just smiled instead. Hudson bolted to his feet, and hurried out the door, thinking that all his hard work had just gone to hell, and he’d messed up. But how? What had given him away? I lost track of his thoughts and shook my head.

“Did he learn his lesson?” Uncle Joey asked.

I shrugged. “Beats me.”

Uncle Joey nodded, and held the opal out to me. “This is for you. Consider it an early Christmas present.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Take it to Dale, at Brinkman’s Jewelry and have him set it for you. Black gold would look amazing.”

I couldn’t hold back my smile. “Thanks Uncle Joey. I will.”

We left, and never heard of Hudson Kramer again, so I guess he took Uncle Joey’s advice.

On another note, now you can see why I don’t mind working for Uncle Joey. I’m picking up my necklace tomorrow, and I can’t wait to wear it. I’ll see if I can post a photo next time.

Until then…

XOXO

Shelby

Date Night

Posted: June 14, 2024 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,
12

From the title, you probably think this is going to be about a date I had that went horribly wrong. You wouldn’t be too far off, but it wasn’t my date. As most of you know, my son, Josh, just turned sixteen and he’s in high school now. Needless to say, the last school dance of the year wasn’t long ago, and Josh got asked by a girl I didn’t know.

As most of you are thinking, yes… I checked her out, and found that she was a senior and quite popular. She was also gorgeous. So why did she ask Josh to go to the dance? I could only guess, but of course, Josh agreed to go, and he thought it was because he was hot and had his own car.

Anyway… to make a long story short, the night of the dance came and she picked him up in a limo. She even came to the door to get him, which was perfect, since I planned on finding out exactly what she was thinking about their date.

Luckily for her, there was nothing nefarious about her intentions, or it might have turned out differently. She’d asked him to go with her because she’d just broken up with her boyfriend and she wasn’t about to miss the last dance of her high school experience. She also thought Josh was really cute, and she wanted to have a fun time with him and her friends. Then I heard that the other girls in the group had asked younger boys, so Josh wasn’t the only one. I picked up that they’d done it to show the senior boys that they weren’t the only fish in the sea, which I had to admire.

Relieved that it wasn’t anything serious, I told him goodbye and hurried out the door myself. Uncle Joey had requested my presence at a dinner he’d scheduled with an out-of-town guest, and I didn’t want to be late. Inspired by the kids, I’d even dressed up a bit, wearing the red dress I’d picked up in New York a few months ago.

At the restaurant, Uncle Joey greeted me warmly with a kiss on the cheek, and introduced me to his guest, Gabe Dunn. He was close to my age, and lavished me with attention after finding out I was Uncle Joey’s niece. Naturally, I knew he was just kissing up, so I didn’t let it go to my head, although I did enjoy being called ‘beautiful,’ and ‘lovely.’

We were shown to a table by a window, and I sat between the two men, which left an empty chair across from me. Before I could ask who else was joining us, Ramos strode to our table. He wore a black dress shirt and jacket combo, and every woman in the place couldn’t take their eyes off him. He pulled out the chair with his back to the window, and sat down with a smile, knowing he was the center of attention, and loving it.

While we looked over our menus, I picked up that Gabe was nervous about this meeting because he owed Uncle Joey a large sum of money, and he didn’t have it. In fact, he was so desperate, that he was willing to gamble his life for it.

Unsure how he planned to do that, I listened real close, but got distracted by a big group of kids coming into the restaurant. There were four couples. The girls wore prom dresses that barely covered their cleavage, and were accompanied by boys in their best suits and ties. Spotting Josh among them, I gasped. Holy hell! Of all the joints in all the city, he had to come to this one?

Luckily, he hadn’t seen me yet, and I hoped he wouldn’t. Still, Uncle Joey narrowed his eyes and glanced my way with a raised brow, asking in his mind if that was Josh… and what was he doing there? Ramos and Gabe had noticed the group as well, and both of them smiled at the sight. Then Ramos’s brows rose and he glanced at me, asking if I knew Josh would be here.

I shook my head and shrugged, trying to ignore the group, and hoping that Josh didn’t notice us. We ordered our food, and Uncle Joey asked Gabe if he’d had a pleasant visit. While they spoke, Josh’s date happened to glance in my direction and her eyes bulged. She elbowed Josh and pointed me out, thinking that I was one of those moms, and maybe Josh wasn’t so cool after all.

Josh spotted me and his face turned red. What the hell was I doing there? Was I keeping track of him and his date? This was terrible. Then he noticed Uncle joey at my side and Ramos sitting across from me, and it all made sense. He relaxed, and a little smile crept over his lips. He sent me a chin-lift and leaned over to his date, explaining that I was with my boss, and that I worked as a private investigator.

Hearing that, his date’s eyes widened and her attitude changed from disgust to admiration. After ordering their dinner, she asked Josh dozens of questions about me and some of the cases I’d worked on. Josh had a great time telling her about my latest escapade with the police in solving a cold case.

Whew… grateful I’d dodged a bullet with that one, I turned back to the conversation at my table. Our entrees arrived and I enjoyed the first few bites of my rib-eye steak and baked potato. After that, I picked up Gabe’s thoughts of desperation, and that he’d have to go through with his plans to kill Uncle Joey. I nearly choked on my last bite and had to take several large gulps of water to wash it down.

“Are you all right?” Uncle Joey asked, patting my back.

I cleared my throat a few times before I could answer. “Sorry… yes. I’m fine now.”

“Good.” He glanced at Gabe and continued their conversation.

Ramos’s brows rose. He hadn’t missed my reaction, and knew something was going on. I smiled at him and nodded. I waited until Gabe took a bite of food, and turned to him. “So Gabe… I understand you’re feeling a little desperate about the money you owe my uncle.”

His eyes widened and he dropped his fork on the ground. “Shit. Uh… excuse me.” He leaned down to pick it up, and set it next to his plate. Turning his mega-watt smile on me, he raised his brows. “Not at all. Whatever gave you that idea?” As soon as he said it, he wished he hadn’t.

“Well… sometimes desperate people do desperate things, so I’m just warning you that killing someone is not always the best solution.”

I glanced at Uncle Joey, who raised his brows and sent Gabe a piercing stare. “You planning a little something to happen to me?”

Gabe swore in his mind and swallowed. “Of course not. I would never do something that stupid.” He glanced down at his hands. “To be honest, I am trying to work out a solution to solve my cash flow so I can pay you back.” He was thinking that he may have thought about killing Uncle Joey, but he’d never do anything like that in a million years.

He narrowed his eyes at me, wondering how I’d known… or maybe it was just something that happened often enough that it was a pretty good guess.

“So, is paying me going to be a problem?” Uncle Joey’s lips turned down and he was thinking that it was just as he’d thought, and Gabe didn’t have the money after all. It was so discouraging. Why did these people guarantee him a nice payout if they didn’t plan to follow through? Were they not scared of him enough? Had he lost his tough-guy image?

I wanted to tell him that he hadn’t lost anything… mostly because so many people wanted him dead, but that wasn’t something I could blurt out over dinner.

Ramos met my gaze, thinking that I’d better figure out a solution, or Uncle Joey would have to do something drastic… like have him break both of Gabe’s legs… just to save face.

My eyes widened and I glanced at Gabe. “Listen Gabe… you don’t want to end up with a couple of broken legs, do you?”

Gabe’s eyes bulged, and he shook his head. “Of course not.” He met Uncle Joey’s gaze. “I’m sure I can get the money together. I just need another day or two. Is that acceptable? I can have it by day after tomorrow?”

Uncle Joey leaned forward. “Let’s finish our meal first. While we do that, you can come up with an offer I can’t refuse. How does that sound?”

Hesitant, Gabe finally nodded. “Sure. I appreciate it. Thank you.” He licked his lips before picking up his dirty fork and began carving up his prime rib. Thoughts of stabbing Uncle Joey with the knife filled his mind, but he pushed them back, thinking that he’d have to figure out a better way to do it. In the meantime, he figured he could sweeten the deal by adding half a million in cryptocurrency. He’d been keeping his crypto for a rainy day, and even though it was all on paper, he hoped Uncle Joey would fall for it.

I wanted to roll my eyes, but I just took another bite of my steak and let Gabe make the offer to Uncle Joey. Gabe thought it was the perfect solution and his enthusiasm kept him talking a lot longer than he needed to. He nearly got all the way to the end of his spiel before he noticed Uncle Joey’s frowny face.

“Uh… excuse me.” Gabe set his napkin on the table. “I need to visit the restroom. I’ll be right back.”

As soon as he left, I turned to Uncle Joey. “I think he might take off. Do you want Ramos to follow him?”

Uncle Joey sighed. “Not tonight. Let’s finish our dinner and we’ll deal with him… later.”

I nodded. “I know it’s discouraging, but don’t lose hope. He might still come through.”

Gabe never did come back. As we finished our meal, I entertained Uncle Joey and Ramos with some of the thoughts I’d picked up from Josh’s table. Most of the girls’ thoughts were about how much they wanted to eat their food, but couldn’t because their dresses would be too tight. Some of the boys felt awkward. They wanted to look cool and make their dates laugh. But all-in-all the group was having a good time… and so did we.

The group finished up, ready to head to the dance. Since our entertainment was leaving, we decided to head out as well. Before we stood to leave, Josh surprised me by bringing his date over to our table. He introduced her to all of us, and both Uncle Joey and Ramos stood to meet her.

She seemed a little star-struck at the attention, especially when the full force of Ramos’s intensely dark gaze met hers. He also spoke to Josh like they were old friends, and it impressed her even more. Needless to say, Josh rose several notches in her esteem, and he didn’t mind that at all.

We said our goodbyes and they all hurried out to their limo. I picked up some nostalgia from Uncle Joey about his high school days, and wishing he’d enjoyed them more. Ramos didn’t have the same feelings since he’d spent most of that time involved in a gang. But it did remind him of his girlfriend back then, and how things could have been different if she hadn’t died.

Yikes. “So what’s the plan for Gabe?”

Ramos smirked. “I’ll pay him a visit later tonight.” He raised a brow. “Hopefully I won’t have to break his legs.” He was mostly teasing. “Did you pick up anything from him that I need to be aware of?”

I shook my head. “Just be on your guard. He was thinking about killing Uncle Joey, but then a lot of people do, so I don’t know if he’d really try it, but…” I shrugged. “You never know.”

Uncle Joey raised a brow. “They do?”

“Only the ones who owe you money… so you should take that as a compliment, right?”

He huffed. “If you say so.”

“Oh… and don’t worry that you’ve lost your touch. These guys are all intimidated and scared by you, so it’s all good.”

His lips twisted. “Thanks Shelby. I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

Who knew those kinds of compliments would ever be a good thing? I smiled at him and we said our goodbyes before going our separate ways; Uncle Joey and Ramos to plan how to handle Gabe, and me to my car and home.

In the end, Josh had a great time and even thought having me for a mom wasn’t so bad. Go me! Uncle Joey ended up getting his money from Gabe, and Ramos assured me he didn’t break any legs in the process.

It turned out that the evening was a huge success after all, which doesn’t always happen when I’m involved. In fact, it was so fun, that I’m wondering if I can manage to be at the same restaurant as my kids and their dates all the time… hehehe.

Mafia Romance

Posted: April 5, 2024 in Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
7

As most of you know, I work for a mob-boss because he knows my secret that I can read minds, and he finds it beneficial to his business dealings to know if anyone’s lying to him.

Recently, his wife, Jackie began writing mafia romance novels (I know, right?). To further her career, Uncle Joey purchased a small publishing company and renamed it “Manetto Books.” So far, her first book is doing great in the mafia-romance genre, and she is nearly finished writing the second one in the series.

With all that going on, most of her work in the office is answering phones and writing books. Somehow, Uncle Joey doesn’t seem to mind. Of course, since they’re married, she doesn’t have to worry about getting fired.

Usually when Uncle Joey asks for my help, it’s to help him with a client, or a business associate, but not today. After I arrived, Jackie invited me into Uncle Joey’s office where he was talking with a suave-looking guy in his thirties. As I entered, they both turned to greet me, and Uncle Joey introduced me to him.

“Shelby, this is Tommy DeVine, he’s an agent who’s interested in the movie rights to Jackie’s books.”

My eyes widened. “Oh wow! That’s great.”

“Hello Shelby.” Tommy held out his hand for me to shake. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too.”

Uncle Joey nodded. “Shelby’s my niece, so I like to involve her in these types of decisions.”

“Of course,”

“So tell us about your offer.” Uncle Joey was thinking that I needed to listen closely to make sure this wasn’t a scam.

Tommy sent a smile Jackie’s way. “My agency liked Jackie’s book so well, we thought it would make a great TV series, so we wanted to represent her if the rights were available.”

Uncle Joey cocked his head. “I can’t argue with you there. She’s a great writer. Yes, the rights are available. What did you have in mind?”

“That’s great.” He glanced at Jackie again. “I understand you’re continuing the series?”

“Yes. I’m almost done with the second book.”

“Great. That’s what we were hoping for. We would have a contract written up that would include all future books, and I can have it to you in the next couple of days.”

“I see.” Uncle Joey’s brows drew together. “And how soon would you have a producer for the TV series?”

“We’d like to start pitching it as soon as all the legal matters are taken care of.” He was thinking that it could take a while, because pitching it to all his contacts might not get the results he wanted, but getting the rights would bring him one step closer.

My brows rose. “But we wouldn’t be giving you the TV rights. You’d just represent Jackie’s books, correct?”

“That’s right… I’d just be her agent and I’d start working on it right away.”

I nodded, but picked up that he was pretty booked for the next little while, but he’d get to it as soon as he could. He’d recently overheard a competitor talking about Jackie’s book, and knew if he wanted to get to her first, he had to act fast. He hadn’t even read the book yet, which he’d always done in the past, but he didn’t want the opportunity to slip by. He could always read the book after that. If it wasn’t any good, he wouldn’t waste his time pitching it. So – he didn’t have much to lose, and everything to gain.

I glanced at Uncle Joey. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to look at his offer.”

Uncle Joey nodded, thinking that I’d picked up something, so he’d go along with it for now. “Sure. We’d like to see it, then we’ll decide what to do.”

“Great. I’ll get to work on it and have it sent over right away.”

We all said our goodbyes, and he left. Jackie was so thrilled, she could hardly think straight. I didn’t see any reason to burst her bubble, since it could still work out. After she went back to her desk, Uncle Joey turned to me.

“So what did you find out?”

I told him all the particulars and he nodded, thinking it was about what he’d expected. “Thanks Shelby. I am surprised he hasn’t read it, but I guess it makes sense.”

“Yeah. So what are you going to do?”

“We’ll see what his offer is. I’ll most likely turn it down, which is what I had in mind anyway. I mean… I know people in the entertainment industry, so I’m not about to go with this guy anyway. I just wanted Jackie to have a thrill, you know?”

“Oh. Right. But aren’t you worried she’ll be disappointed?”

“No… she’ll understand. She’ll want the best agent to represent her anyway, so it’s all good.” He was thinking that he wasn’t sure he wanted her books turned into a TV series. It was a little too personal, so he wanted to take it slow. Plus, if it ever did make it to the big screen, finding someone to play him would be hard… there just weren’t that many actors with the chops to do him justice.

He glanced my way and winked.

I chuckled. “You have a point.”

“But… of course, I won’t completely rule it out.” He rubbed his hands together, thinking he could make a lot of money on a TV deal, and, with the right wording in the contract, it wouldn’t come back to haunt him.

“Sounds good. Let me know what happens.”

“I will.”

I left soon after that, stopping at Jackie’s desk to share in her excitement before heading home. I knew that, depending on how much money he could make, Uncle Joey would definitely consider it.

Just thinking about it triggered my imagination. What actor could play Uncle Joey? And then there was Ramos. Who would play him? Was there even an actor alive that could do him justice? Not that I could think of. Still, I could hardly wait to get home and do a google search of hot Latino actors who could do the job.

Anyways… Now I kind of hope it happens, because how fun would it be to see Uncle Joey and Ramos on the big screen? Plus… since I knew Jackie had already written a character based on me in the second book, I could be part of it as well. Whoa! Who could play me?

I guess that’s all for today. I’ll keep you posted about the deal, but if you have any good ideas for actors, I’d be curious to know who they are!

Until next time!

~Shelby

Stress Relief

Posted: August 19, 2023 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , ,
12

Lately, I’ve had a lot of stress in my life. There are several factors that probably contribute to this. One might be that I work for a mob boss. Another might be that I also work for the police. Besides both of those, I have my own consulting agency. Then there’s my family. Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and kids, but raising two teenagers can be a bit of a challenge.

But I think the biggest stress inducer is the fact that I can read minds. I used to think it was awesome to know what people were thinking, but now, I’m not so sure. If you don’t believe me, you should just think about it for a minute. Would you want to know what other people really thought about you? I didn’t think so.

I’ve had some time to work with a counselor and I’ve found meditation to be helpful. And I do love long baths. But to be honest, the best stress reliever for me is taking a motorcycle ride. As you may know that involves a certain hitman, which means that if I want my favorite stress reliever, I have to deal with some stress inducing problems.

Like today… I stopped in at Thrasher for a quick meeting with Uncle Joey… the mob boss for whom I work. That quick meeting turned into two hours, and by the time we were done, I could hardly wait to get out of there. But Uncle Joey wasn’t done with me. I had to stay for another meeting. An hour later, the meeting ended, and he invited me to his office for a chat. I may not have stayed, but he needed to know what everyone had been thinking during his meetings, and I had to fill him in before I forgot.

Luckily, I had plenty of notes, so it didn’t take too long. He isn’t always happy with what I find out, mostly because a lot of people don’t tell the whole truth and it makes him angry. Still, he’s gotten more used to it since the early days, so it’s not so bad.

Still… by the end of our little meeting, my stress levels were pretty high. That’s when Uncle Joey told me he had one more thing for me to do. I may have glared at him, because his brows rose, then his lips twisted up. “Don’t worry Shelby. You’ll like this one.”

I couldn’t pick up what it was and shook my head. “Really? Why?”

“Because it involves a motorcycle ride. What do you say?”

I let out a sigh. He knew I couldn’t resist that. “Is it far?”

He nodded. “Oh yes… all the way to the private airstrip and back.”

I licked my lips. That was a nice ride, and it would certainly go a long way in reducing my stress levels. “Okay. I’ll go.”

His knowing smile almost made me tell him no… almost, but not quite. In fact, he knew that I’d do practically anything he asked if it included a ride with Ramos. As if thinking about him conjured him up, Ramos knocked at the door and poked his head inside. “Are you done?”

“Yes. Here’s the package.” Uncle Joey handed a large envelope to Ramos. “Shelby’s going with you. I need her to tell me his reaction to the contents. And… she really needs to get out of here.”

“Is that right?” Ramos raised his right brow, thinking that was code for Manetto rewarding my diligence and keeping me happy after what he’d put me through.

“Yes it is.”

I threw up my arms. “Can we just go already?”

It didn’t take long before we were on our way. Ramos was thinking that Uncle Joey knew my weakness and now he would use it whenever he wanted… but he wasn’t going to complain. He probably liked it almost as much as I did.

I wanted to swat him, but he was right.

So there you have it. Never reveal your weakness to a mob boss if you want to stay out of his grasp… unless it’s going for a motorcycle ride with Ramos. Uncle Joey thought he had me over a barrel, but if you really want to know, I think it’s the other way around. Just don’t tell him that.

Spring Fling

Posted: April 27, 2023 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , ,
32

I’m not sure how it happened, but somehow, I got roped into helping at the high school Spring Dance.

My best friend Holly is actually the one who roped me into it, since she was in charge. Her oldest child is a senior and Holly is president of the PTSA, so she needed the help. It didn’t seem fair since neither of my kids were going, but that was because Savannah is still in junior high, and, as a sophomore, Josh had no interest in Senior Prom. Still, when your best friend needs you, you help out.

Holly doesn’t know I can read minds, but she believes I have premonitions, which is what I tell everyone to explain my ability. Because of that, Holly thought I would be the perfect person to watch over the dance in a security capacity to make sure nothing bad happened. Considering all the school shootings, I couldn’t blame her for wanting the event to be safe, and who better to do that than someone who had premonitions? (her words… not mine)

Naturally, I said yes, but only on the condition that I was there in an official capacity. She agreed, and provided me with a black t-shirt that had SECURITY in white capital letters across the front, along with a school pass in a lanyard. That way, I could tell the kids what to do and get away with it. I’d be sure to wear my black jeans, along with a belt that held my stun flashlight. She had another t-shirt made for the gym teacher, who would be my partner, and we were all set.

That night, I arrived at the school wearing my official lanyard, along with the black security t-shirt, jeans, and boots. My stun flashlight in a case on my belt was a nice touch, and I’d pulled my long blond hair into a ponytail and wore my black cap with ‘security’ written across the top that I’d used before when I’d helped Uncle Joey. All in all, I looked pretty bad-ass.

I walked into the gym, which had been decorated like a woodsy forest, with fake trees, grass, and dangling vines and flowers, and, I had to admit, I was impressed. Holly was already there and hurried to my side. “Shelby! I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Hey, no problem. This looks great.”

“Isn’t it cute?”

“Sure is.”

She took me to her PTSA office and unlocked the door so I could leave my jacket and my purse inside. Back in the gym, she took a deep breath, hoping her news wouldn’t upset me. “Um… it looks like Coach Monson has come down with a bad case of stomach flu, or food poisoning, so he’s not going to make it. I’ve asked a couple of the other teachers to take his place, but so far, I haven’t had any luck.”

“Oh… that’s too bad, but I should be okay.”

She nodded, but she was thinking that, even though I looked official, the kids might not take me seriously. Sure, I had ‘security’ in bold letters across my shirt, but I wasn’t big enough to haul someone out of the gym on my own. But maybe I could ask someone for a favor? She wouldn’t mind seeing the hot hitman again, and he would certainly intimidate anyone who got out of line.

“You want me to ask Ramos?”

Her eyes widened. “Uh… yeah, I was just thinking that. Do you think he’d come?”

“I can’t ask Ramos. I owe him too much already. Besides, he’s probably busy.”

“You don’t know that for sure. Even if he could only come for a couple of hours, it would be worth it. We probably don’t need him until things get going, around eight or so. You could at least ask him, right?”

I shook my head. “Only if you have something to offer him. He won’t do it for free.”

“Even for you?”

“Oh… he’d do it for me, but then I’d owe him, and I’d have to do whatever he wanted… you know? I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

She blinked, immediately thinking that he’d want a night of hot love-making, and her eyes widened. “Oh! Wow! I see.” She was thinking that it might be worth it… unless Chris found out… then it would be bad. But a night with Ramos? It made her hot all over just thinking about it.

“Holly! I’m not doing that!”

“Oh… good. I mean… of course you’re not.” Her brow wrinkled. “Wait. Did I say that out loud?”

I shook my head. “You didn’t need to. It was written all over your face.”

“Sure. Got it.” The lights dimmed and a few of the kids from the dance committee began to drift inside. “I’ve got to go, but please think about asking him? I don’t want anything to go wrong tonight.” She handed me a small bag. “Here’s the other t-shirt. I’ll check in with you later.”

She hurried off, leaving me holding the bag – in more ways than one. Still, I was not going to ask Ramos. No way.

Half an hour later, I was having second thoughts. None of the kids seemed the least bit intimidated by me. A couple of the boys even raised their glasses of punch to me, thinking I had no idea they’d added vodka to them. I marched over and demanded that they hand over the flask they’d brought, but neither of them had it anymore. I picked up that it was being passed around, and they didn’t know where it was by now.

I spent the next half hour trying to track it down, but there were just too many students, and I had left my post at the doors for too long. Holly found me and asked me to patrol the hall outside the gym for troublemakers. I found a couple of boys trying to break into someone’s locker and told them to knock it off. One of them told me it was his locker and he needed something from it. Dismissing me, they went back to jiggling it open.

Since they were lying, it made me mad, so I stepped closer and pulled out my stun flashlight. “Move away, or you’ll get a taste of this.” I held the flashlight up and pushed the button. Instead of the zap I’d been going for, the light switched on. Crap. “I mean this.” I hit the other button and got the buzzing zap I’d wanted, but they weren’t impressed.

One of them held up his hands. “Oooo, I’m so scared.”

The other kid hit his friend and turned to me. “Don’t listen to him. We’re going.” He pulled his friend past me and back toward the dance, thinking that they’d come back later after I’d left.

The kid being pulled away called over his shoulder. “You know you can’t touch me with that thing… unless you want to get sued.”

I sighed. He was probably right. Kids didn’t seem to respect adults much. What was up with that? Or was it just me? Being the security person was a terrible idea. Defeated, I meandered back to my place at the doors. Was it even worth trying to do this job, or should I just let everything go and only act if someone’s life was in danger?

If Ramos were here, it would probably be different.

The next few minutes brought a new wave of kids into the dance. Most just wanted to have a good time, but I managed to catch a few stray thoughts of trouble… mostly pranks, but I didn’t like it. At least everyone had to pass through security, so I didn’t have to worry about guns or knives, but what the heck?

Holly came back to my side. “How’re you doing? Everything okay?” She was thinking that I might need some help with the crowd. “I called the coach, but he’s still too sick to come. Are you sure you can’t call Ramos?”

“Fine. I’ll call him, but that doesn’t mean he’ll come.” I pulled out my phone and pushed his number.

“Thank you.” She was thinking that the doors to the boy’s and girl’s locker rooms were locked, but someone needed to check them, along with the bathrooms and the halls again.

Ramos picked up. “Babe. What’s up?”

I sighed. “Um… I might need your help.” I explained where I was and how the coach was sick so I was going it alone. “But if you’re busy… it’s no big deal. But just so you know, my friend Holly really wants to see you again.”

Holly smacked me, but it was worth it.

He snickered. “Yeah… hang on.” I waited a few seconds until he came back on the line. “I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

“Great. I’ll meet you in the parking lot with Holly. She’ll make sure you can get in, but you should probably leave your gun at home.” That was mostly for Holly’s sake so she’d know what she was getting into. Ramos snickered again and disconnected the call.

“He’s on his way.”

“Awesome!”

Ten minutes later, Ramos arrived on his Harley. Holly nearly fainted, but managed to stay on her feet long enough to get him through security. I handed him the security t-shirt and the lanyard that went with it. He shrugged off his black motorcycle jacket and both Holly and I froze in anticipation. But instead of taking off his t-shirt, he just pulled the new one over it. I think Holly sighed, or maybe it was both of us. Either way, we managed to breathe again and took him down the hall to the gym.

Close to the gym, Holly unlocked the door to the PTSA room so he could stash his jacket there beside my purse, and we hurried into the dance. It only took a few minutes for our eyes to adjust, but we got started right away, and I found it was a whole different story with Ramos by my side. He hardly had to say a word to intimidate anyone, and the rest of the evening went by with only a few minor incidents.

The dance ended at eleven, but by then, most of the students had cleared out anyway. Holly hurried over to thank us before we left. In the process, she managed to give Ramos a big hug that lasted a little longer than was necessary. Naturally, I couldn’t blame her, and since Ramos didn’t seem to mind, I managed to keep a straight face.

After we gathered our things from her office, we walked out together, stopping at Ramos’s bike.

I turned to face him. “Thanks for your help. It made a big difference.”

“You’re welcome. It was… interesting.”

I smiled. “That’s putting it mildly. I guess I owe you… again.”

“Yes. You do. It’s turning into a long list. I’ll have to figure out where to start, or you’ll never get to the end of it.”

I chuckled. “You mean there’s an end?”

“Not if I can help it. But there is something you can do for me right now.”

“What’s that?”

“All you have to do is stand still and don’t move.”

Alarm tightened my chest. “That’s all?”

“Yup.”

I couldn’t pick up what he planned. Still, it was a simple request. What could happen? “Okay.”

He leaned in close and I caught his woodsy, masculine scent that made me a little dizzy. Barely holding back a smile, he lingered close for a few seconds before brushing my cheek with a kiss. His mouth moved toward my ear and he spoke in a low tone. “Goodnight Shelby.”

Chills ran down my spine. He straightened and slipped on his jacket. Before he could put on his helmet, my wits returned. “So does that count? Toward the list?”

He arched his brow. “Babe… that’s just the tip of the iceberg… but if it will make you feel better, sure.”

“Great. See you Monday.” As he drove off, I sent him a wave, happy to start witling down the list. But on second thought, did I really want to do that? Maybe not, but since it was such a long list already, I’d have the rest of my life to get to the end of it.

With that happy thought, I headed home, ready to tell my kids they were only allowed to go to a school dance if I was there working security. Since they’d hate that, maybe I’d be off the hook, and never have to do security at a school dance again.

Special Delivery

Posted: March 9, 2023 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , ,
10

As most of you know, I work for a mob boss whom I call Uncle Joey. He’s not really my uncle, but after working for him for a couple of years, he’s become like family. This should make me more nervous than it does, but I make it a point to stay on the good side of things, and do my best to know as little about the bad side as possible.

Of course, the main reason I work for him is because I can read minds and he coerced me into it. But, since that goes for him as well everyone else, it gives me a little more wiggle-room than most people.

I’m also a certified private investigator, so I have clients that I help as well. Which brings me to my story.

My newest client, Henry, thought someone was following him, and he wanted to know who it was. That seemed like an easy task, since all I had to do was watch him for a day or two. If someone was following him, I’d take a few pictures, and that would be that.

Of course, it turned out that he worked for a florist making deliveries, which meant that I had to follow him all over the place. After two hours of doing that, I worried that my cover was blown, since I was now the one following him. Still, I did my best to keep watch.

That’s when everything changed.

My phone rang with the familiar tune of “Devil Rider,” which meant it was Ramos calling. He’s the hot, motorcycle-riding, hitman who works for Uncle Joey. Grateful for the distraction, I quickly answered. “Hey Ramos. What’s up?”

“Babe. Why are you following Henry?”

“What? Oh my gosh! Are you the person following him?” I glanced behind me, then along the street on both sides to see him. “Where are you?”

“I’m in a car just up the street.”

I looked, but couldn’t see him anywhere. “Which one?”

“It’s a white Camry.”

I still couldn’t see it, but then, I’m not much of a car person, and there are a lot of white cars these days. “Hmm… well… I can’t see you. I guess that means you’re good at your job.” I didn’t say, and I’m not, although I thought about it.

“Well… I’ve had a lot of practice. So I take it Henry hired you?”

“Uh… yeah.”

“What did he want?”

“He said that he thought someone was following him, and I’m supposed to figure it out, and show him pictures of who it is.”

“And you didn’t pick up anything else, like… what he did, or why he was worried?”

“No. He wasn’t thinking about that, and honestly, I didn’t want to know.”

Ramos let out a breath. “Hmm. This is good. I think we can help each other.”

“How’s that?”

“Henry’s been using his delivery service for more than just flowers. I won’t bore you with the details, but he’s been passing off… certain items in a messenger bag. I’ve been trying to discover who he’s been delivering them to, so that’s why I’m following him. But now that you’re in the picture, and he knows you’re there, you can keep an eye on him for me.”

“Hmm… okay, but you’ll owe me.”

“Babe.” His voice was low and gravelly. “You owe me far more than this little favor. Do I have to remind you of how many times I’ve saved your pretty little neck?”

Guilt washed over me. “Uh… no… no… of course not. I was just joking.”

He snorted. “Right. So this is what I want you to do. When he makes his other deliveries, he takes a messenger bag with him, and he comes back without it. I just want you to take note of where those deliveries are.”

That didn’t sound too bad. “Okay. How many of these ‘other’ deliveries are there?”

“I’m thinking three at the most. But he might surprise me with more.”

“Okay.” I spotted Henry coming out of the building he’d just been in. “He’s back, so I’d better go.”

“Thanks, Shelby.” He disconnected before I could ask him if he was going to keep following us, but since I was doing his job for him, he probably didn’t need to.

As I pulled onto the road to follow Henry, I glanced at all the white cars I could see, but I never spotted Ramos. He was good.

By the end of the day, I’d taken note of five different places where Henry had left a messenger bag. Ramos would be pleased. But what was I going to tell Henry? I was pretty sure Ramos wouldn’t want me to tell him he was being followed by the mob. But that left me looking a little incompetent.

Still, I figured I could tell him I hadn’t seen anyone… since that was true, and only charge him half of what I normally did to assuage my guilty conscience.

When he was done for the day, I gave him my offer and he took me up on my generosity pretty fast. “So that’s it? You’re not doing this again tomorrow?”

“Uh… nope. But good luck and all. Stay safe.”

He looked at me kind of funny, and was thinking that I might know more than I let on. I sent him a nod. “You might want to think about changing jobs. Messengers don’t always have the best of luck when they’re delivering something they shouldn’t… you know?”

His eyes widened, and I sent him a wave. “See you around.”

As I walked back to my car, I picked up that he was having second thoughts about his other delivery service. Maybe it was time to walk away before it got him killed.

Since I thought that was a good idea, I turned around and gave him a thumbs-up.

So that’s my story. I guess it just goes to show that a mob boss has all kinds of connections I’d never know about. But you know what? Like I said earlier, that’s just the way I want to keep it.

Recipe for Disaster

Posted: January 26, 2023 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , ,
21

Yesterday, I got a phone call from Dimples asking for my ‘special’ help. This particular case had stumped him and the other detectives for several days, and they’d decided it was time to call in the big guns… me. As the resident ‘psychic’ for the police, I get called in when nothing else seems to work, even though not all of the detectives are convinced that what I do is real.

Only Dimples knows the truth that I can read minds, which is just how I like it. Can you imagine how twitchy everyone would get if they knew I could hear their thoughts? It would be a disaster of epic proportions, so it’s much better to say I have premonitions. Still, it does make things a little awkward when I have to explain myself. I mean… premonitions aren’t quite the same thing, so I always have to tell them I have a feeling about someone or something that’s about to happen, and it can get a little confusing.

I walked into the department and Dimples sent me his biggest smile, mostly because he knew how mesmerizing I found his dimples. It was kind of like a reward for coming in to help him, so I couldn’t complain. If you saw his dimples, you’d totally understand… I mean… they’re huge and they’re always moving, like they have a personality all their own.

“Glad you could make it,” Dimples said. “Have a seat, and I’ll explain what’s going on.” I took my seat beside his desk and he began to tell me about the case. “There’s a person of interest we’ve been watching for the murders of a couple of women, but we don’t have enough evidence to get a search warrant.”

“Wait… like a serial killer?” I’d actually known a serial killer. In fact, I’d almost become one of his victims. I shook my head. “You know how I feel about those types of murderers… are you sure you need me?”

“Yes. If anyone can stop him, it’s you.” Since I wasn’t convinced, he kept talking. “Shelby… you know how they work. If we don’t stop him, he’ll keep killing people. You’ll be saving lives.”

I closed my eyes and let out a breath. “Ugh… I know, I know. I just hate being involved with them. Their minds are…” I glanced around to make sure no one could hear me and lowered my voice. “… like the cesspools of humanity. I always feel like I have to take a long shower afterwards, and I’m still not clean.”

“I understand it’s not pleasant, but we’ve run out of options.” He was thinking that taking an extra shower or two was worth saving someone’s life.

“Ouch… that hurt.”

He had the decency to lower his gaze. “Sorry… I forgot you’d hear that.”

“It’s fine. So what’s the plan?”

“I thought we’d visit him at his house and maybe you could pick up something. We’ll say it’s a follow-up, since we’ve talked with him before. I’ll tell him that we suspect one of his neighbors is acting suspiciously, and ask him if he’s seen anything unusual. It actually works pretty well since the guy told us about the neighbor in the first place.”

“Okay. Just make sure he invites us inside his house. If I can ask questions about his house, it will get him thinking about where he hid the bodies, or what he did with them.”

“I can do that. Let’s go.”

It didn’t take long before we were knocking on the suspect’s door. The curtain twitched before the door opened and a thirty-something man with a dark beard and longish hair stood in front of us. He wore glasses and jeans with a graphic t-shirt that drew my eye, mostly because of the slasher movie depicting dead people and lots of blood. That seemed a little obvious. Was that why the cops thought he was their killer?

“Hey Colton. I’m Detective Harris, and this is my colleague, Shelby Nichols. I was here the other day, and we have a couple of follow-up questions about your neighbor. Could we come in?”

His gaze darted to the side, like he was checking out the cleanliness of the living room, before he pulled the door open. “I guess. What did you need to know?”

Dimples asked him a couple of leading questions about his neighbor, while I glanced around the room. It was clean enough, but something was definitely off. Colton kept fidgeting, tapping his hands against his leg and rubbing his arms. It smelled like he was cooking some kind of meat dish, with lots of onions and garlic.

He finished answering the question, giving me an opportunity to speak. “You must be a good cook. What are you making that smells so good?”

Instead of relaxing, he got even more agitated. “Oh… it’s nothing exciting, just a beef stew recipe of my mom’s. I like to make it when I’m feeling lonely.”

“Oh… that makes sense. I take it you live here alone?”

“Yeah. My mom passed a few years ago.” He was thinking after I killed her.

I blinked. “Oh… I’m so sorry. You must miss her.”

He nodded. “Yeah… every now and then, but the stew helps me feel like she’s still here.” He was thinking it helped him lay the past to rest and get rid of the evidence at the same time.

My stomach clenched. Did that mean what I thought it meant? I swallowed and tried not to freak out.

Dimples glanced my way, noticing my white face, and wondering what was going on. Since I’d quit talking, he continued the conversation. “My wife makes a great stew, but it doesn’t smell as good as yours. Could I get your recipe?”

Colton’s eyes widened. No one had ever asked him that before. “Sure. In fact… I was just about to eat. Would you like to have some?”

I coughed to cover my gagging reflex. I couldn’t seem to stop and Dimples began to pound on my back. “Could I get… some… water?”

“Sure.” Colton left and I turned to Dimples.

“We can’t eat that… it’s people.”

Dimples’s eyes widened. “Like soylent green?”

“Huh?”

“Never mind… I get it. I’ll figure something out.”

Colton came back with a glass and I took it. After a couple of swallows, I managed to talk. “Thanks. I’m feeling a little sick, so I’ll have to pass on the food, but thanks anyway.”

He looked a little disappointed, but nodded.

“I’d like some,” Dimples said, surprising me.

“Great. I’ll get you a bowl.” Colton hurried back to the kitchen.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“I’ve got an idea.” Before Dimples could explain, Colton came back with a bowl of steaming stew and an eager twinkle in his eyes. He was thinking this was one for the history books. If anyone ever found out. Still… getting a cop to eat one of his victims was like the icing on the cake. “Here you go. I hope you like it.”

“Thanks.” Dimples stirred the stew and sniffed it. “It sure smells good… but it’s a little hot. I’d better give it a minute to cool down.”

I was ready to knock it out of hands. He glanced my way. “Shelby? Are you okay?”

I shook my head. “I think I’m going to be sick.” I wasn’t even lying this time.

“I’d better get you home.” He took my elbow and helped me stand. Then glanced at Colton. “Hey… do you mind if I take this with me?”

Colton’s mouth dropped open, but Dimples continued. “Thanks man. I’ll bring the bowl back.” He rushed me out of the house before Colton could protest. We practically ran all the way to the car. Somehow, I managed to get inside, and roll the window down for some fresh air. That would have worked just fine, but Dimples handed the bowl of stew to me so he could drive.

“Oh hell no.” A fresh wave of nausea rushed over me. “What are you doing?”

“That’s the evidence I need to nail him. Whatever you do, don’t puke.” He was thinking that the lab should be able to analyze the meat, and it would give him the evidence he needed to get a search warrant, or, even better, make an arrest.

I closed my eyes and held the bowl as far away from me as I could. Next, I leaned my face out the window so the cold air could blow over me. That seemed to do the trick, and my stomach settled a bit. Still, I didn’t dare open my eyes until we’d parked at the precinct and Dimples had taken the bowl from my hands.

“You coming?” he asked.

“Go ahead. I’ll be there in a bit.” It took a good ten minutes before I felt well enough to get out of the car. Dimples had taken the stew to the morgue, so I sat down and waited for him. By the time he got back, I had mostly recovered.

“Thanks Shelby. I know that was unpleasant, but I think we’ve got him.” He turned to the other detectives and told them what we’d discovered. I was fine until someone asked him if he’d tasted it.

“Gah! I’m going home.”

Dimples held back a chuckle and thanked me again. He said he’d let me know the results, and, in the meantime, they would be watching the house to make sure the guy didn’t leave town. He was hoping for an arrest tonight, or early tomorrow at the latest.

That was yesterday. This morning he called to tell me that he’d made the arrest and Colton was now behind bars. They’d found more evidence in the house, but I told him I didn’t want to know all the details. He was okay with that, but couldn’t help adding that he’d managed to take of photo of the stew recipe.

“Ugh!!” I hung up on him and tried not to puke.

So… I guess it all worked out, but seriously, I’ll never be able to eat stew again… probably for the rest of my life. Dimples told me catching the killer was worth it, and I guess he’s right. But please… if you ever invite me over for dinner… don’t make stew!

Multiple Choice

Posted: December 12, 2022 in Advice, Consulting, Experiences, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , ,
56

I don’t know about you, but I have a hard time finding the right Christmas gifts for my family and friends. I mean… what do you give a mob boss who has a ton of money and everything he could ever ask for? So this year, I thought it would be fun to give Uncle Joey and his hitman, Ramos, t-shirts with funny sayings on them. But even that is proving hard. So I’m hoping you can help me pick the right one.

These are my my choices for Ramos. The first one I found says “If people could read my mind, I’d get punched in the face a lot.” Since I can read minds, it’s perfect, right? He teases me enough that I feel like punching him, although I’m not sure he’d think it was funny. What do you think? Here’s another one that could work. It says “I work out because punching people is frowned upon.” That’s a possibility – but then, he really does punch people, and he doesn’t think it’s so bad, so which one is better?

I found several that I thought might work for Uncle Joey, but I need your advice on that as well. The first one says, “Don’t piss off old people, the older we get the less ‘life in prison’ is a deterrent.” Saying he’s old might upset him, but the rest of it is funny. Here’s another one I found for him. It says “I’m not bossy, I’m the boss.” And “I am not like a boss, I am the boss.” Or “I’m not bossy, I just know what you should be doing.” And finally, “The Big Bo$$.” So which of those do you think I should get?

Naturally, I found a couple that would work for me. One says, “My boss told me to embrace my fear, so I hug my boss.” Cool, right? Here’s another one, “My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.” Hahaha! But since I’m getting shirts for them and not me, probably not.

I also found one for Dimples that I’ll probably give him. It says, “Stupid people keep me employed” and it has a police car and badge on it. There’s another one that says “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.” So which one of those should I get?

Last, I found one for Jackie, the person who really runs Uncle Joey’s office. It says, “Queen of the Office” and I found another one that says, “Secretary: noun. 1. An individual who does precise guess-work based on unreliable data provided by those of questionable knowledge. See also wizard, miracle worker.” I’m not sure about those either, so if you have a preference, let me know!

So here’s my multiple choice list for your vote.

Ramos: A – “If people could read my mind, I’d get punched in the face a lot.” or B – “I work out because punching people is frowned upon.”

Uncle Joey: A – “Don’t piss off old people, the older we get the less ‘life in prison’ is a deterrent.” or B – “I’m not bossy, I’m the boss.” or C – “I am not like a boss, I am the boss.” or D – I’m not bossy, I just know what you should be doing.” or E – “The Big Bo$$.”

Dimples – A – “Stupid people keep me employed” or B – “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”

Jackie: A -“Queen of the Office” or B – “Secretary: noun. 1. An individual who does precise guess-work based on unreliable data provided by those of questionable knowledge. See also wizard, miracle worker.”

So there you go! I hope you’ll take a minute to vote so I can get my Christmas shopping done!! Thanks so much – also here’s one for you: “A day without reading is like…. just kidding, I have no idea.”

Until next time!

~Shelby

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